I love public libraries. Unnaturally so. I go at least once a week. Even more often, I think about going again. And each and every time I leave with multiple items. It's literally one of my favorite things. If you want, I'll even take you with me...but you must remain quiet (and silence your cell phone...Duh!).
Here's the problem: I only read about 1 in 3 of my finds. No, not because they aren't interesting or well written, I just don't read them. I look at them. I recheck them out until I've reached my maximum extension (which sadly is like 2-3 months). Maybe I have some sort of possessive disorder.
Is that a real disorder? The need to horde potentially interesting books belonging to the community. Could I be a borderline criminal? I mean today, book-hording....tomorrow, kidnapping?!?...dognapping (there might be some reality in this one)?!?
Side note: It does exist. (biblioklept, biblioclept 1. A book thief or someone who steals books. 2. Besides the direct biblioklept there is the indirect thief who borrows and never returns books to their proper owners (including a library).) This is real, people. I have a disorder.
Kinda.
I must stop before I become some strung out addict stealing the bedtime stories of little children and racy paperbacks from beach-dwelling geriatrics.
Do I clip my plastic card of public privilege or do I bite the bullet and start reading?
2 comments:
Oh you are hilarious! Great writing! I better start watching my back though...you might come takeover my library up the street!
Read on, my friend. It's food for the soul.
do you also keep them beyond their period and have 100s of dollars you owe the public library system? cuz i do. in several cities, as a matter of fact..shoot
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