Oh I have. On the bus. And for a minimal fee, I'd be willing to get their autographs for you. But for those of you who scoff at public transit, I offer up the joys that this service brings. Enjoy. (Oh, PS- I totally scoff at its cleanliness...so some scoffing is approved.)
Why everyone should take a trip on le autobus:
My new European BFF
He's perfect. He could be in a Killers video. I envy his thick, luxurious, chocolaty locks. I am also impressed how normal he looks with a bushy handle bar mustache...mmm...impressed and intrigued. Teach me your ways, trendy Euro man. I want to be hip like you, in your skinny ankle length jeans. The bomber jacket exudes cool, no matter the country. And well, the ankle boots just pull it all together. Please ride again soon. Maybe next time we can go get expressos and talk about joie de vivre.
Women drivers
I am a terrible driver...but I might get better. However, there are some of my gender who seem hell bent on destroying any hope of out driving not being stereotyped based on our gender.
#1 - woman who turned in front of a moving bus. Don't worry, death by city bus isn't painful or anything.
#2 - Lady Bus Driver, I didn't realize a bus could go that fast...really!, I thought Speed was a fictional movie. Thank you for proving me wrong by letting me arrive home alive. You make me feel more driven than ever to get a vehicle. Please look into a career with Nascar.
#3- Senora Space Cadet Bus Driver - Oh. What? You wanted to get off? Four stops ago? Oopsies! No, really. She said that. And yes, the cord was pulled, the bell rang, the light was lit. Just not in her mind.
Old People
I wish I could wear my slippers in public too.
Kenny Loggins
Works for UTA...he drove me to work, twice. Apparently songs cost extra. Maybe next time. Footloose? Danger Zone? No? Dang.
Crazy Lady
I'm not sure who she was talking to, since no one responded to her joke. But she felt the need anyway to mention the irony in the Auto Repair sign that advertised where to go for tune ups. "Tune up in the rear. Oh dear. I don't want to go there. Haha." Really, lady? It's not that funny.
Look what you are missing, my friends. Whole cultures you never dreamed existed...and all together. Life is good riding on le autobus. Come ride with me.
3 comments:
i wonder what crazy lady, bad woman driver and kenny loggins are writing about you. haha. THAT would be something to read.
in the meantime, great post. it made me laugh, it made me cry. i laughed because it was funny and i cried because i haven't seen you in ages.
much love,
martha
You've pretty much convinced me to sell my car and travel away my years on the bus system... never-ending entertainment!
wait. wearing slippers in public isn't kosher?
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