Karma's a beast...

but also has crazy, mad irony skills.

The Preface:
Sabbath day observance now starts at 1pm for me, which completely interrupts my drowsy, almost-a-nap-time. Rude, I know. Whilst Comrade and I peruse the local wards for a suitable fit, we must also adjust our whole sleep schedule. So it came as no surprise this past Sunday  when our battle proved to be a losing one. I can neither confirm nor deny that we casually sauntered away before our last meeting.

Excuses, now follow: we were both super sleepy AND not in a socializing mood, which for us turns into humorous diatribes and verbal sparring...not the best for first impressions. AND it was a beautiful day. AND...ok so I don't have anything legit to use.

The Scene of the Crime:
BUT it was such a beautiful day! The sun was out for the first time in days and a cool spring-like breeze was beckoning me. It was a if God was willing us to enjoy the park nearby.

So we did.
...with a light picnic and some blankets for napping.

What could possibly go wrong on this glorious day? (famous last words)

It happens:
So I start telling Comrade about this uber funny (if not slightly inappropriate) YouTube video [side note: I have an obsession with sharing YouTube vids] called "You don't know Jack Shitt". See for yourself:


Laughing, giggling, and the occasional swear word ensue. The swears were necessary for retelling purposes. Naturally.

So right in the middle of my story, I feel something wet on my face. Fearing the worst, I turn my cheek to Comrade and say "Is this bird poo on my face?"

Tears start streaming down her face as she is no longer breathing, and only silently laughing.

"IS THIS BIRD POO?!?" She refuses to give me any sort of answer. I take her rudeness as confirmation of the most ironic punishment I have ever received for swearing...I said shit and God promptly delivered. If only the things I wanted came as quick!

The lesson:
Watch your mouth, cause if you say shit, a bird shall shat on your face. Which is a far better threat than Tabassco on your tongue.

I think I've given up swearing.